
Ever find yourself thinking:
"What if my officemates think I'm not good enough?"
"What if I mess up this project?"
"What if I get fired?"
These thoughts run through your mind over and over again.
During meetings, you stay quiet, fearing that your ideas might be ridiculed.
When given a task, you spend way too much time double-checking your work,
worried you might have missed something.
You even avoid social events with your colleagues. you think, "They probably
don't want to hang out with someone like me."
When you interact, you overanalyze every conversation later, thinking about how
you might have said something wrong..
sounds familiar?
You're not alone.
My friend, that's perfectly normal..
We pay attention more to negativity than positive ones.
we are programmed to think that way..
its called negativity bias..
Ever notice that when you hear news about someone who just died due to heart
attack, you start feeling anxious about your health, even if you have no
symptoms, and may start seeking medical check-ups or avoiding certain things.
This is our body's way of protecting us, reacting to anything that might harm
us. Our mind acts as a threat detector.
But here's where the problem kicks in..
Most people lack awareness, they think that these negative biases are actually
their thoughts.
They let their thoughts control them instead of them controlling their
thoughts..
It now becomes a double edged sword..
It does more harm than good.
Over time, they become comfortable with negativity, and it becomes a routine.
Now, since they don’t want to feel alone, they validate their feelings to feel
accepted and be heard.
And this is why they talk negative things, which attracts negative situation,
negative things, negative people in their lives.
Then they end up being with groups of people who experience and share similar
feelings and experiences as them.
But instead of finding comfort, they just get stuck in a loop of constant
worries.
Why? Because being with these groups, though well-meaning, often simply reaffirm
your emotions and feelings.
Hearing others echo your worries will only make them seem even more real.
Its like music, it doesn't change our mood but rather strengthens and deepens
the feelings we already have.
A sad song can make us feel even sadder, while an energetic song can make us
feel more energized.
This constant negativity leads to more negative thoughts, enjoying bad news,
spending time with negative people, spreading hate, reminiscing about past bad
experiences, complaining a lot, blaming others, and playing the victim.
The main reason why we we cant stop thinking negative things despite making
efforts to think positively, It's because we subconsciously put ourselves in
places of negativity, and it becomes a cycle..
So, what’s the solution?
Here's a simple trick that worked for me:
1. Watch only videos or listen to things related to success
Regular exposure to positive messages reinforces a positive mindset. When you
have positive thoughts, you will feel good. If you feel good, you will take
massive action. Taking action gives you confidence, gives you results and
eliminate negativity.
2. Surround yourself with uplifting and positive people
I have a sister, who only talks tagalog, but when she moved to Ilocos Norte, she
became fluent in Ilocano. Why? because of her environment. Same goes when you
join group of people who are positive and uplifting, you will most probably pick
up their character, attitude, values and positivity.
3. Read personal development books
If you're not engaging your brain with new information, it's more likely to
dwell on past experiences, which are often negative. This happens because our
brains are wired to prioritize and remember negative experiences as a survival
mechanism.
When you read a book, it captures your attention and diverts your mind from
repetitive, negative thoughts. By seeking new information and experiences, you
can train your brain to focus on the present and future rather than getting
stuck in a cycle of past negativity.
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